Consider the Wildflowers

3 years ago today, I agreed to a date. I had been divorced for over a year and was coming out of dating HELL. A relationship with another guy was seriously the last thing on my mind. I was convinced all men were spawns of Satan. I had read self-help books to seek any and all relationship advice I could use to help me find the “perfect man.” Rewind to about 2 months prior when I was sent a friend request on Facebook. I accepted and noticed this guy liked pretty much every comment or picture I posted. Occasionally he would even make a comment. I just kept on hating all men. However, one comment a few weeks after we became Facebook friends, got my attention. I was tagged in a picture my pastor had posted of him with my son. The comment was sweet and respectful. It was also the first time a man had shown interest in my children’s lives. However, I still wasn’t commenting back because I was determined to be single for a very long time. A week or so later, I posted some professional pictures that I had made of the boys and myself. I was declaring my independence as a single mom and I was darn proud of myself. Plus, they were super good pictures! Of course, there were lots of comments; mostly aimed at how much my boys had grown and how pretty the scenery was. HIS comment, however stood out. He not only commented on my boys but he commented on me as a mom. He got me. He hit my soft spot. Later that evening, I decided to DM him and thank him for the kind words. He immediately responded and thus began our messaging journey. We texted for 2-3 weeks and talked about everything. I was completely honest with him; I was NOT interested in anything with a man. He was understanding. Eventually I received a very lengthy but sweet message asking me out. Truthfully, I wasn’t even sure how I wanted to respond but I listened to that little voice in my head and agreed to meet him and maybe develop a friendship. 4 days later we had our first date; a walk around a local park and a trip to his home where we sat on a porch swing and talked for hours. He seemed sweet….but I was still very guarded. We had our second date about a week later and in between dates he would leave flowers and one time chocolate in a lunchbox cooler (so it wouldn’t melt) on my doorstep. He was definitely working it! I kept waiting for something to go wrong, for me to do something that would run him off, or for him to just get sick of waiting for me to come around to my senses LOL. But he didn’t. The moment I realized he was different was the night he met my boys. I was sooooo nervous. He called me and asked if he could bring ice cream, and of course, we all agreed. He met my boys and it was almost an instant relationship, particularly with my youngest, who immediately climbed onto his lap like they had known each other forever. It was truly beautiful to watch. My prayers went into overdrive as well as my fears but literally everytime I had a doubt, he would prove himself over and over. That bad gut feeling that I had basically lived with during my dating life was gone. And when I finally quit holding my breath and let God be in control, EVERYTHING (quickly) fell into place. We fell hard and fast. The love was like nothing I had ever experienced. I never had really believed that people just “know” when they meet someone but it was so true. A month into our relationship I knew, without a doubt, that this man was meant for me and my boys and I was meant for him and his children. Fast forward a few months and we were engaged….six weeks later, married. I will save those special days for another post. As for today, I am so thankful that I got over my pride and agreed to that first date 3 years ago. Ladies, I promise, there are good men out there. You just have to pray, be patient, and probably kiss a few frogs along the way.